Wednesday, October 20, 2010


Dear Husbands,

If there are any of you out there reading this, I would like to take the opportunity to help your marriage. Your wife will think you are the most wonderful husband in the entire UNIVERSE.

First, if you come home and the house is a disaster, your wife's hair is a mess, she's not wearing makeup, dinner isn't ready yet, and she looks like she is about to kill something this does not mean she is PMS-ing and you should run and hide yourself in your office until it's time to say family prayer and go to bed. This does not mean you should be cranky and frustrated with her for not keeping up with the house, and don't be offended when all she can manage to throw together is grilled cheese and tomato soup. This, in all reality, is a wife's S.O.S. This means she is in desperate need of your help. She has had a long frustrating day, hasn't even had the opportunity to get to take a shower or do anything for herself and she is about to break. Instead of being annoyed at her, try saying, "Honey, it looks like you've had a rough day. Is there something I can help you with?" She will probably break into tears and run into your arms and ask you to hold her and she will thank you over and over.

Second. After the kids are in bed and she's got a pile of laundry on the couch (that YOU took out of the dryer and threw there), is cleaning up from dinner, doing the dishes and trying to straighten up the house all at the same time, (Yes, it is possible. We wives call it multi-tasking) this is not the time for you to stand in the kitchen and watch with a blank stare like, "What? Um, it's bed time. Why aren't you going to bed?" Let me tell you something. Some times the ONLY time we can get the house back in order is AFTER the kids are in bed.

Third. When your wife is scrubbing the dried tomato soup from the counter and you can tell something is bothering her and she admits that she is frustrated and tired and really could use some help, you don't stand there dumbfounded and then say, "Well, I'm going to bed." That usually causes tears after you close the bedroom door.

Please enjoy and USE the tips I've just given. You have no idea how much it will mean to your wife.

5 people leaving some love!:

The Yoder's Four said...

I'm sorry, Nat! I was having a day like that yesterday, but thankfully my husband took the kind, caring, bring home balloons route instead of the zoning-out-playing-computer-games-for-3-hours route. Sometimes they do need things spelled out for them! Sounds like Mike's spoiled by you normally having everything running seamlessly!

Lara said...

I really hopep these tips don't stem from a bad experience (although we've all been there).


(I may leave your blog post up on my computer and hope my husband "stumbles" across it. Thanks.)

The Mursets said...

I am so sorry! Sounds like a horrible day...I wish I could have been there to help out in some way.

Chris said...

Men just aren't programed the same way as women. I wish they were. Sorry you had a bad day. Good thing you know how to comunicate your feelings/day . I tend to say harsh things & make my hubby feel worse than I did. I'm working on that.

Frahs Family said...

You know, it sounds funny, but deployment has taught that to my husband. He was so bad about all that stuff before but since he has been back it is a world of difference and each deployment he gets even better. It is so tough to be separated from him but seems worth it in the end lol.