It has been kind of a rough week. My Grandma Nora passed away this week and it has been such an emotional roller coaster. She had been in and out of the hospital for the past year or so, and the last few times were really hard because we didn't think she would make it. So, we'd come to grips with the fact that she's going to die, and then she'd pull through and go back home and we could take a sigh of relief and thank Heavenly Father that she made it through it. Then, a month later she'd be back in the hospital. My heart just ached for her and for my family. It's so hard to be so far away and feel like there is just nothing you can do other than pray your hardest and put names on the temple prayer role. This time, Grandma said she had had enough. She really wanted to be back with Grandpa again. It's an interesting thing to be on your knees, pleading with Heavenly Father for a tender mercy...and then when your prayers are answered, your heart still breaks. It's like being torn in two. One half is rejoicing that she doesn't have to suffer anymore, and I know she is having the most beautiful reunion with dear Grandpa, her mom and her other family who has already passed on. The other side of me is having the hardest time dealing with the idea of her really being gone. Not being able to say good-bye to her, not being able to go to her funeral and get the closure I need...it's just really tough. It somehow doesn't seem real yet. I can't imagine her not being at her house sitting in her favorite gray recliner, or not getting to hear her voice any more (well, for a long time anyway...) and the family going through their things and deciding who gets what...it just hurts so much! The last words I heard her say were "I love love love you." I can't think of any better last words. I'll miss her so much, but I am so grateful for the knowledge that families are forever. I know we'll be together again. I know she is soooooooo happy right now and I am so grateful and blessed to be a part of such a wonderful eternal family!
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Posted by Natalie at 6:52 PM